Workplace Evolution: How To Say "No" To Superiors Bravely.

Children in the workplace always want to grow up.

The perfection of your abilities, the enhancement of your sense of security, the accumulation of resources and the improvement of your conformity will make you gradually take off your initial cowardice and gradually develop your self-consciousness.

We do not want to be aggressive in the workplace or to rebel in the process of growing up.

In the new stage of the workplace, the attitude of "I came to study", "how much salary does not matter, and the accumulation of experience" will gradually become "I am valuable". "I should get paid for my work".

To say "no" means an active choice, which means that you have the ability to see what is most conducive to your own development and that you are qualified to decide what you should do.

A good command of rejection will also make the people around you more respectful.

Everyone's career begins with "yes", because at the beginning, rejection is always considered to be profound and the consequences are often greater losses: loss of trust, no appreciation, no recognition.

But everyone's career must have been moving forward in countless refuses, because only when they are not overwhelmed by trivial things can they concentrate on what they are good at and necessary.

Let's start with a story.

Two years ago, my cousin L resigned from the central enterprises and opened a company with several people to contract some projects.

In the first year, the company got good results, and the working hours were free and the income was much higher than before.

But who knows that second years to catch up with the decline in the effectiveness of the industry as a whole, the risk resistance ability of small companies is limited. At the end of the year, we sat together to count the number, and each person divided into 50 thousand yuan to go home for the new year.

This is the whole year's total income. It is equivalent to the income level of the small assistant employed by the company. The monthly salary is fixed at 4000 yuan per person.

That day, L counted out the bill in front of me: the daily expenses of the family, the cost of the children's kindergarten, and the payment of various social insurance. 7788, the basic cost of the family was about 80 thousand yuan a year.

I suggest that he find another way out.

The management of small companies is not standardized, and the accounts of several projects are mixed up. When the funds are tight, the debt collection calls are one after another.

In my opinion, the low income is not a big problem at the same time, but the key is that such a company can not see hope, so it is more realistic to find a formal unit to be a project manager while young.

What I have said is that L feels reasonable, but when it comes to resigning, he is in ten thousand difficulties.

The boss of the company knew him well. When he was most embarrassed at that time, the boss extended his hand to help him.

So in L's view, it is ungrateful to leave the company at this time.

What he prefers to see is that one day, the company announces disbanded, and everyone goes on a different journey. In such a way, he leaves much less psychological pressure.

A similar situation happened to my classmate H.

At that time, H was a small employee in a public institution. His salary was not high and his prospects were slim.

By chance, he was seen by his former partners and recommended to the core Department of a large central enterprise, and a new platform has been set up since then.

The original thing can be ended here, but "Bo Le" obviously did not intend to release this "giant horse": his speech draft, his on-the-job doctoral dissertation, the report he had to hand in, and the articles he planned to gather into a book.

All of these are given to H students, even though they are not in a single unit at all.

On the day of the party, H complained bitteringly. Every day there was a lot of work in the company. After he finished work, he went to work at "Bo Le" to work overtime, almost became his personal assistant, and it was free.

"No way to refuse, I can have everything now because of his appreciation."

H said, "I can't bridge the river."

Almost all career survival guides tell us that learning to say "yes" is the foundation for a person to stand in his office.

Especially for newcomers, obedience and compromise are more likely to enable you to integrate into a team in a short time than doubt and rejection, so as to win opportunities for further display of abilities in the future.

But Mr. Hao can't go on doing it all the time.

Sometimes, we are not satisfied with the status quo, or have an instinctive revulsion against someone else's request. Even if the disguise is better, dissatisfaction and resentment will be shown through subtle changes in the mood.

At this time, is it a decisive refusal or a reluctance to go contrary to one's wishes? Or from another perspective, from the perspective of career development, what kind of psychological process do we have to go through from "yes" to "no"?

The same happens in the workplace.

The young man who just walked into the office is like a weak child. Without accumulation, inexperience and lack of connections, he summed up in a sentence that he did not have the ability to live on his own strength.

At this time, the most important thing is to get a sense of security from the environment so that your colleagues, superiors and partners will know you, know you and trust you.

Therefore, you must give up some of the benefits to complete the process of integration, so that you can survive.

At this time, "no" directly threatens your living environment.

But children in the workplace always want to grow up.

The perfection of your abilities, the enhancement of your sense of security, the accumulation of resources and the improvement of your conformity will make you gradually take off your initial cowardice and gradually develop your self-consciousness.

In the process of growing up, rebellion manifests that in the workplace, we begin to realize our value gradually.

In the new stage of the workplace, the attitude of "I came to study", "how much salary does not matter, and the accumulation of experience" will gradually become "I am valuable". "I should get paid for my work".

To say "no" at this time means an active choice, which means you have the ability to see what is most conducive to your own development and are qualified to decide what you should do.

Last month, my friend met a thing in the gym.

Because of a little negligence, the cleaning aunt was rebuked by the director in the eyes of the public.

Aunt did not excessively defend what, just put off the tooling and said "I quit" and went away.

The supervisor at that place had to pick up the broom and roll up the trouser tube to clean up the locker room.

In the current labor market situation, aunt cleaning is likely to find a job with higher salary and better environment in second days.

It is not encouraging everyone to be here.

When we are having problems at work, it is actually a reflection of our own value and a respect for the people around us.

Obedience to rejection is a natural process, which is also closely related to mental state.

I realized that for L cousins and H classmates, maybe they haven't come out of the "child" state. Their ego is not strong enough to get rid of psychological dependence.

But after all, the workplace is the pursuit of maximizing the interests of the place, rejection and rejection will inevitably happen.

How can we judge whether a thing should be accepted or rejected?

At this time, we must seriously consider three questions: is I capable of accepting it? If I accept it, will I be unhappy because of my own interests? If I refuse, can I bear the consequences?

If you want to clear these three questions, your inner voice is still saying "no", then it is a good decision to refuse.

Don't worry too much that your refusal will disappoint the other person, because no requirement is justified and must be done by you.

When you put aside your unreasonable expectations, things will be reduced to "how to refuse effectively".

I saw a Taiwan variety show some time ago, and invited seven or eight foreigners to talk about the strange things they met.

I was impressed by the answer of one of the American boys.

He said that when he first arrived in Taiwan, he always could not understand the "rejection" of the people around him because almost everyone was saying, "I am busy", "I will have a meeting later", "next time," instead of saying "no" directly.

This euphemistic excuse was uncomprehensible to him at that time. "I really thought they were not available. They kept asking" when did you have time "and made everyone embarrassed.

Excuses are commonly used in life.

In particular, in Oriental habits, the reason for rejection is attributed to external factors, which do not hurt face and solve problems.

But in the workplace where efficiency and certainty are concerned, this "tacit understanding" approach does not work at times.

When you do not have a clear attitude to a task and just emphasize difficulties, there will be people like the American chap who will shift their energy to help you solve practical problems.

Therefore, the first step to refuse is not to make excuses, but to say "no" firmly.

Next, in order to ease the atmosphere, the excuses that were prepared before finally came into use.

A reasonable reason will make your refusal look less rigid.

One thing to remind is that one reason is enough, too many irrelevant excuses will appear to be false and unreliable.

The third step of rejection is appropriate advice.

You can recommend alternatives, give a brief view on the solution, offer some encouragement, or offer as much assistance as you can in other areas.

On the one hand, this proposal and attitude are conducive to solving the problem in a most comprehensive way, and on the other hand, it is also an effective way to appease the mood of the rejected.

In short, it is necessary to say "no" in the workplace. It is not necessary to compelled or fear, because everything happens naturally.

One thing to remember is that even

How to stop it again, the tone can not be too hard.

After all, who knows if someday you will have something else to ask?